Are you waiting for the right time to take your life to the next level? That time is right now. Are you waiting for the right time to create a special moment with your loved ones? That time is right now. Are you waiting for the right time to follow a passion or dream? That time is right now. It's a hard truth to understand that sometimes tomorrow never comes, especially if you are waiting for it. Everything in life awaits your engagement. Opportunities, friends, soul-mates, being appreciated and finding a purpose are all acts of intention and engagement, not things you simply find.
It's ok to want friends. It's ok to want opportunities. It's ok to want to be acknowledged; to be noticed, appreciated, accepted and understood. Everyone needs to be heard. But when you are frustrated waiting for these things to arrive, instead of getting angry or impatient that they are not happening — give them to someone else. Notice someone. Share your appreciation. Accept someone. Earnestly listen to someone who's in need of acknowledgement. It is by withholding what you deeply need from others, that you keep it from yourself. When you put your needs into service in the lives of others, your needs will then be met. And don't forget to give to yourself what you want from others. The love and attention you always thought you wanted from someone else, is the love and attention you first need to give to yourself.
If you want anything meaningful in life, you need to be that meaningful thing. You keep waiting to meet an amazing new person, a friend, a life partner or a business partner — people who share your values. Then when you meet that special person, you may put them on a pedestal, where there is nowhere to go but down, so they disappoint you. But really, it was you who disappointed yourself with your expectancy. Maybe they disappear after a short time, or it fizzles out. But often we are the cause; it us us who again disappointed ourselves. Too often, we push people away with these unreasonable expectations. If you do this in your life, it is because you just couldn't let them be human, because you don't accept your own humanity. You wouldn't let them be real because you aren't real. You think people are disappointing, but maybe it's you who are disappointing people all the time, and you don't even know it. Sometimes people vanish because we vanished — we expected them to act as we act, to be as generous as we believe we are generous, to be as excited as we are excited. Where we think they failed, perhaps we failed them. In many cases, it is just plain and simply fear that destroys our best opportunities. Fear can cause us to suspect people don't like us, which can lead to insecurity, cynicism, negative thinking and unjust actions. Sadly, what we fear we often bring upon ourselves. Start with the simple practice of believing what you want is possible for yourself. It may take time, but everything positive will spring from that one simple practice.
Learn to minimize your fear and to embrace disappointment as cheerfully and positively as possible. Count on people to fail you. Plan on people never coming through. You are going to have to fight your way through all on your own. One thing you can count on is people not showing up when you need them. Don't look at people's unreliability pessimistically, just vow to never be like them yourself. If you build people's failures into your success strategy, you will not be caught off guard by surprises. And, when and if someone ever comes through, you can rejoice in the rare blessing of that event! Be continually surprised by people, rather than being continually let down.
There is a way of having your needs met without negativity and complaining. If you want something — give it. Being positive, giving and caring may not always work out exactly the way you wish, but whatever you give will come back to you one way or another. Your giving heart may inspire change in another, or qualify you for a better situation if the current situation must eventually change. And, even if it fails with the person in whom you wish to see a behaviour change — even if they are totally non-responsive, dysfunctional and a taker — you still can't lose, because you can never lose by being awesome and by being your very best.
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|It is by withholding what you deeply need from others, that you keep it from yourself.
|When you put your needs into service in the lives of others, your needs will then be met.
|The love and attention you always thought you wanted from someone else, is the love and attention you first need to give to yourself.
|What we fear we often bring upon ourselves.
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Bryant H. McGill
Human Potential Thought Leader ✮ WSJ & USA Today Best-Selling Author ✮ Top Social Media Influencer ✮ UN Appointed Global Champion ✮ 12+ MILLION Social Subscribers ✮ Reaching 50+ Million Weekly ✮ Syndicated on People Magazine & Huffington Post Celebrity ✮ Co-Founder of McGill Media & Simple Reminders, SRN, and the Royal Society
"I live in Miami with my wife Jenni, and I have three amazing daughters. I am a simple person, who as a boy, ran around barefoot on a dirt-road in Alabama — dreaming of being a writer. I am probably best known as a writer of pithy sayings and small, simple aphorisms which have found their way into tens-of-thousands of publications, including by some of the biggest publishers in the world. I love to inspire people and show them their inner-beauty. I see the world spiritually. My mission is to cause people to consider kinder ways in which we could do business, structure our relationships and treat the world." Bio