# Journal - Recording, Fear, and Accountability ## Why I recorded I hid audio recorders everywhere because I was terrified. People were screaming at me, hitting me, lying to me, going crazy, breaking windows, giving me black eyes, deleting data, and destroying equipment. Of course I was recording. I was terrified, and I needed an [[Independent Record]] of what was happening. The number-one thing they were upset about was that I was recording. Three different people violently ripped or tried to rip recorders off my body. I usually secured the recorders in a manner similar to police equipment, using heavy-duty nylon. After engaging in behavior I was trying to document, each of these people wrestled me to the ground and tried to rip the recorder from my neck. The nylon pulled against my skin and gave me rope burns. As far as one-party and two-party recording states are concerned, in most instances I was wearing the fucking recorder openly around my neck on that heavy-duty nylon, with a large red light flashing. The recorder was plainly visible. That fact belongs in any later assessment of how the recordings were made and how obvious the recording device was to the people present. All three apparently thought they were going to get away with what they had done. At the time, I knew they were getting away with it because other people allowed them to control the narrative and because I was too terrified to speak up for myself. I also knew they would not get away with it indefinitely. I kept the recordings and continued building the archive. ## Accountability statement To every person who did not support me, take my side, or give aid while I was actively being abused and terrified: **you people are assholes.** Just because I allowed other people to control the narrative—and did not speak up for myself because I was too afraid—does not mean that narrative will survive the evidence. Once I am done transcribing everything, you fuckers are going to realize that you allowed bad things to happen to me and my daughters. Nobody is getting out of this without accountability. As I always told everyone, I knew this would be a five-to-six-year process or longer, and I told them all. I kept everything, including things that incriminate me. This archive is not an attempt to manufacture innocence by selectively preserving only favorable material. It is an attempt to preserve the record. No one is getting out of this without accountability. Let’s see if you motherfuckers can out-lie these recordings. Let’s see if you can twist the truth around your own fucking words. It is almost funny that the perpetrators think this is over. It has not even begun. I am playing the long game. Accountability is inevitable. ## Documentary meaning of accountability The accountability described here is documentary: retention, inventory, transcription, time-coding, cross-reference, correction, and confrontation with the complete record. The commitment to keep even self-incriminating material is part of that standard. ## Archive context [[Index - Partial Audio Archive]] presently preserves every path from one accessible manifest—2,851 unique entries, including 2,793 recognized media files. Bryant identifies the more-than-200-GB portable subset as approximately one quarter of a roughly 5,000-hour audio corpus, implying more than 800 GB of audio holdings. The three recorder-removal incidents will be linked to exact media, dates, participants, and transcripts as those recordings are processed. ## Related records [[Journal - The Pen-and-Paper Trap]] · [[Index - Partial Audio Archive]] · [[Index - Audio Transcriptions]] · [[Independent Record]] · [[Documentation Suppression]] · [[Documentary Evidence Continuity]] · [[Index - Pattern Ledger]]