# Assertiveness **Domain:** Communication / Boundaries **Doc Type:** Concept Node **Maturity:** Developed ## Definition **Assertiveness** is the ability to state a need, position, request, or limit clearly while preserving the equal dignity and agency of everyone involved. ## Mechanism and Practice Graduated practice teaches that a request can survive acceptance or refusal. Clear language, toleration of discomfort, and respect for the other person's answer turn self-advocacy into a repeatable social skill. ## Relationships - **Related concepts:** [[wiki/Boundaries|Boundaries]] · [[wiki/Self-Advocacy|Self-Advocacy]] · [[wiki/Composure|Composure]] ## Simple Reminders, Quotations, and Thoughts > “The power of asking grows through graduated practice. Ask for the clarification, the introduction, the correction, the opportunity, and the fair term until the nervous system learns that a request can survive both yes and no.” > **— Bryant McGill**, *Assertiveness for Introverts and the Power of Asking for What You Need - Livestream (Nov 2015)* [[reminders/Agency/A Request Can Survive Both Yes and No by Bryant McGill|A Request Can Survive Both Yes and No by Bryant McGill]]